Rules to live by

Sometimes children possess such wide-eyed wisdom that it takes my breath away.

At the start of each school year, on the first day of school, we sit down together as a classroom community to talk about how we want to be together. First, I ask the children to envision a classroom where their bodies and minds feel safe enough to make mistakes and try new things, where they feel comfortable and supported as they work and learn. What kind of learning community do we want to be? Then, we discuss the rules and guidelines they think we need in order to make that happen. I record our Class Agreement in the children's own words.

In his essay titled "All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten," Robert Fulghum writes, "I realized that I already know most of what's necessary to live a meaningful life--that it isn't all that complicated. I know it. And have known it for a long time. . . . All I really need to know about how to live and what to do and how to be I learned in kindergarten. Wisdom was not at the top of the graduate-school mountain, but there in the sandpile at Sunday School."

If only all of us could live by the rules the children have proposed for our classroom community, the world would be a peaceful place.

Come peacefully.
This one was proposed by a second grader for whom personal peace has sometimes been a struggle. What a gift to hear him offer a statement so poetic and profound!
Be kind. Protect each other. Be careful with your body and your words. Treat others the way you would want to be treated. Use an inside voice. Walk carefully.

Bring your hard-working self.
Bring an "I can" attitude. Choose challenging work. Do your best. Work during work time. Play at recess.

Be honest. Take responsibility for yourself.
This one evolved from, "Don't blame others." They needed a little guidance to turn the "don't" into what we will do instead, but we all agreed the rule was clearer in the end.

Help each other.
This provoked some discussion about what it means to "help." Help others figure it out for themselves. Don't tell them the answers because then they won't learn it. Raise your hand to give everyone a chance to think.

Respect and protect the materials.
I love the way the children worded this! In a Montessori classroom, this is critical. Much of our hands-on learning equipment is expensive and fragile. Some of the materials in our classroom have been used by children for close to twenty-five years (a few were in the classroom when Mrs. D's daughter was a student)! We rely on the children to use them with care.

Listen to each other.
This one's tricky because you can't see listening. We talked about how a listener can show a speaker that s/he is listening: Put your eyes on the speaker. Answer questions but don't interrupt. Sit with a quiet body.

Probably all of us know a few adults who could benefit from these rules. A big part of our work in the Montessori elementary classroom is the not-always-graceful, sometimes stepped-on-toes dance of how to live these rules day to day. The vision is simple. Living it is the challenge . . . no matter how old you are.

What We're Reading:
Whoever You Are by Mem Fox
Our Peaceful Classroom by Aline Wolf